http://grungust.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] grungust.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] southofreality 2011-04-19 10:17 pm (UTC)

First time posting on this comm just to tell you how AMAZING your war!AU has been.

Both are grim and gruesome, but you pull it off in a refined way. This installment was especially interesting in that you convey the horrors of war with a "rear lines" sentiment. That the soldier sympathetic to her requests doesn't return was an especially powerful moment, and the subsequent decision to stop asking about the medicine was heartbreaking in its simplicity. In being selfless, she conveys a certain selfishness.

But the real ringer is that this chapter stresses the fact that life goes on. Even amidst the backdrop of a vicious war, Jasmine is still a young girl dealing with a broken heart. If you played it solely as a war story, it would have been powerful, but the fact that you make it all dovetail together into a single, sweeping epic of heartbreak and denial of simple wishes makes it cut all the deeper.

You've done an amazing job, and I can't wait to see parts 3 and 4.

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